The Inner Workings of my Mind

Today I feel...sad, confused, alone, a little mad, a little jealous, and just bleh. I think it's a little bit of everything causing me to feel this jumble of emotions. I found out a coworker is pregnant and I felt like god or mother nature or whoever slapped me in the face. The day after I found out I cannot conceive without the help of a fertility specialist my coworker announces she is pregnant. Am I wrong to feel this way?  I know, I know, PCOS is not a "death sentence". Just because I'm not ovulating doesn't mean that I cannot have a baby. But it does make things just a tad bit frustrating and complicating.  "Here's a short list of what you can do to help while waiting to see the specialist".  1. Lose weight. Well, hallelujah, that's such a simple task, let me hop right on this! Oh, wait, already here. I've been trying to lose weight for, oh, I don't know, years? When you break your entire fucking leg and have to be non-weight b

I don't really know how to define myself.  My name is Kaela. I am 28, work at a job that I'm not very enthusiastic about.  I'm a student working on my bachelor's degree in healthcare administration.  My favorite color is green; but not just any green. I really love the green that is like a deep forest-y color, has a steely grey color to it. It's hard to describe.  I enjoy trying new foods. Sometimes I enjoy food too much. Believe me, it shows.  I love to read, but it's hard for me to get into just any old book. I hope to one day write my own book.  History fascinates me but in more of an anthropology way. I guess, really, people fascinate me. But I love learning about different cultures and their beliefs and traditions.  Animals are wonderful. I used to ride horses as a form of therapy. I miss that. I love video games. Online games were my way of coping with life in the past when things were tough. I don't play them as much now, however, they're